On Monday, I had a spring in my step. At 10am, the time of day when I usually head to my favorite neighborhood coffee shop with my favorite coworker Alex for my second dose of caffeine, I broke out in a spontaneous “I got some” song and dance in the elevator (it’s really more of a jig with the words “I got some” repeated over and over). The day itself was rather uneventful but extremely busy so I didn’t give much thought to the fact that I hadn’t heard anything from Cody.
On Tuesday I had dinner with an old buddy from college after work at the Blue Ribbon sushi restaurant on 58th Street. I thought it was strange that Cody still hadn’t called but I didn’t want to freak out and get all girly. Even though he did say he would text me when he made it back to the city on Monday. He’s probably just really busy I told myself and then patted self on back for not picking up the phone to call/text him first.
By Wednesday I started freaking out a bit. Did he not enjoy himself Sunday night? Was I the only one who wanted a repeat of our hot and steamy evening together? The scenes played on a loop in my head: the way he threw me on the bed, the feel of his strong muscles underneath my fingers, the dirty talk… But then the text that I had been waiting for finally came in to quell my fears.
“Very excited about hockey season.”
I thought it was a kiss-off (sadness) but another one came in later on in which he told me he was lying in bed naked. I’m assuming he was thinking of me though he didn’t actually put that part in.
Wednesday night = happy hour. Thursday night = Bikram. I was too liquored up and dehydrated to worry about Cody both of those evenings.
On Friday while I was at the Beacon Theater to see the band moe., I received another mysterious text: “knowing that you are dancing turns me on right now.” But no mention of another romp in the sack. Am I overreacting or is this weird?
Why am I hung up on the fact that he hasn’t called to see me again? We’re not in a relationship and I think we both just needed a good fuck. But a very large part of me is obsessed with having sex with him again. I’m hoping that will dissipate when I meet someone else who might be interested in a similar arrangement. And also, maybe—just maybe—I would like validation of the fact that he had a nice time with me as well.
So much for the theory that I can have sex without the emotional attachment.