The other day I came across a post on Facebook about someone who was upset by covid-19 derailing her wedding plans. And she felt an odd sense of guilt admitting that out loud, as though she should accept the hand she’d been dealt without complaint, because so many are experiencing much, much worse. It resonated. Though Bryan and I had tentative plans this summer to have a small beach gathering to exchange vows (or cows, as my phone keeps autocorrecting lol) on the beach, what upsets me the most is that we should be celebrating the happiest day of our life—the birth of our daughter—and instead we have to keep her quarantined and ourselves isolated because of a plague that’s claiming the lives of thousands of people.
I think it’s okay to mourn the loss of life as we know it; to feel angry at the circumstances we now find ourselves in—they are not ordinary by any stretch of the imagination. Who could have thought up this world just a few months ago, when we were blissfully unaware of social distancing and a life spent in quarantine?
I flash back to my baby shower often and laugh at some of the things I worried about then. Family members who drove me crazy, the guest list and prep work, and details that seem (in hindsight of course) completely irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. I consider myself so lucky that I had the opportunity to have so many people gathered together in one room to celebrate this new life. I know that one day soon we’ll meet up again and reminisce about these strange times. I hope we do that sooner rather than later, and I can’t wait for the time Bryan and I can pass Mila around like a hot potato. Our families especially have waited so patiently to meet and hold her.
I realized that keeping some semblance of normalcy has helped me immensely during this time so I figured I’d share a few things that have been working to get me through each Groundhog Day. Let me know if you have anything to add!
Keep a routine or schedule. If you have a planner, use it! Map out your weekly dinners, create a daily to-do list of things that you’d like to accomplish (things like, send an email to so-and-so, phone a friend, organize office drawer, etc). Obviously some things will look a bit different, but giving yourself a sense of purpose at the start of each day will make you feel like an important and integral part of society still. I promise!
Do all the things that spark joy (okerrrrr with the Marie Kondo bullshit, but hear me out). I’m not talking about organizing your kitchen cabinets but if that’s something that makes you happy, then have at it. What I mean is don’t let quarantine derail things that don’t need to be changed—but come up with new and creative ways to get shit done. If (like me) you love to cook, get back into it. If you’re having a hard time finding ingredients in stores, get creative in the kitchen! This is also a great time to focus on projects you’ve let sit for too long. Think of how good you’ll feel when that sweater you’ve been knitting is finished or you complete that 1,000-piece puzzle!
Connect with friends and family now more than ever—this one is important for me. Every day I make it a point to get on a call with someone I love or text a friend I haven’t heard from in a while. If I’m being honest, sometimes I feel postpartum sneaking in and having these connections to friends/family helps me immensely get through each day <3
And the last and final one:
Get dressed and take a shower. Every day. Even when you haven’t left the house for your daily walk or you just don’t feel like it. In fact, you should get dressed especially when you don’t feel like it.
Tell me what measures you are taking to resume some kind of normal in extraordinarily unusual times. As always, I love to hear from you, my sweet ones. I’m thinking of you, and sending you much peace.